Loss is for the living, life is for dead...

 Looking at radiant blue sky illuminated in golden hues by majestic sun on leisurely Sunday afternoon, and it suddenly felt like deja vu. Afternoon ambling towards evening and sun slowly going down, turning snow clad mountains of dhaula dhar into canvas of orange bliss and long orange shadow reelecting across sapphire blue waters of mighty Beas river. Sun going down used to feel like a loss of another day, dark engulfing what we can see and chilly winds of winter touching your skin and shivers go deep upto soul. It always used to touch a raw nerve, triggering a sense of loss inside me, winter chill and dark of night. It felt like life giving way to death, vibrant colours replaced by all engulfing black, time for foxes and panthers to come out and reclaim the land for them during night to what was lost to mankind gradually during day. Why do we fear night, why it triggers a sense of fear, unknown, why every movement can be interpreted in thousands ways to make us afraid. 

Mountains are full of ghost stories, peaks dedicated to fights between devas and dayanas, peepal tree given to ghost to hang and merry making during night. Scary stories during childhood became butt of jokes growing up and we making fun of each other in believing those stupid stories and armed with science and logic, disavowing ghosts and chudails as myths. Till one day it happened...

I had my encounter with the residents of other realm, in a series of events which can't be explained by logic and science and suddenly I became a believer again. It all started at 2 am, rainy night in month of July, when mountains are drenched and soaked in rain. We were a bunch of 6 kids, returning home from a marriage, laughing, joking and then we stopped to drink water. We were standing near a giant baniyan tree, a spot used to hang people during British era and one which is famous for sightings and strange happenings. As usual, one of us pointed that out and we start making jokes and one of us even throw a stone towards the tree, and I believe thats why it started. Suddenly we hear a barrage of stones thrown around us, and it felt like landslide (quite common in taking season), we look around and everything was serene, moon just went behind the clouds and all we can hear was sounds of stones falling around us. We took the hint and started running and then it felt like stones are falling in front of us, we were trapped in a narrow path between two slopes. If we ran back we hear stones being us and if we ran forward we hear it in front of us. We started shouting and then ran towards near by houses. We ran and ran for close to 2 km and constantly the sound was behind us, sound of landslide, sound of hundreds of stones thrown around you. We were in middle of rural legend which we used to make fun of and the only thought on our minds was to get to the fields where we can be safe from getting trapped between mountains. Scariest 15 minutes of our life later, it finally stopped, we were in open fields, moon just came out from clouds and I know thousands of poets wrote beautiful songs about moon, but at that moment the moon light seems like it belongs to other realm, it is for forces which we have relegated to background during day time. No more I was skeptical about ghosts, no more silent fun of old folks while they were telling tales of ghosts and chudails. I felt that first hand and it changed the way I approach unknown. 

Strangely I recovered from the shock quickly on few days and so does other (I believe pahadis are naturally resilient) but it opened my mind to the possibilities of dead living among us. No one is really dead, we travel from body to body and some of them who get stuck between transition tube into ghosts, bhoot, pisaach, chudails, ardh-mashania( a ghost with fire bowl in place of face and mountain legend is that anyone who faced it never survive). When we are faced with death it's a loss for us, person gone forever from this life of us, never to be seen in body, but considering that souls live on, death is merely a blip for dead, Death is a loss for living, but Living is actually for dead. Vaccum gives a sense of peace, so does looking at sea or nightly mountains for few moments, then imagine the peace soul must get after living and being trapped in this body for years, going through wear and tear and abuse, and then one day nothing but peace. I believe death is not dark, I believe it is the only true light, long bliss, till we join the living again, to go through emotions, pain, happiness, fun and chain of losses of near and dear one till we die and start living again..